One of the best stand ups that I have ever seen in my life is by Kevin James called Sweat The Small Stuff.  It is amazing.  Well, at least it is to me because it is basically everything that goes through my head too.  You should definitely watch it!  Anyway, one of the things that seems to bother him the most is standing online at the bank.  I think I understand the feeling.  Waiting can be one of the most difficult seasons to be in.  In the world that we live in, waiting is something that we minimize as much as possible.  Drive-thru, HOV lane, interstates, rush shipping, etc.  Why are we so opposed to waiting for things?  Scripture says in Isaiah 29:11-12,

“I know what I’m doing. I have planned it all out-plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future that you hope for. When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I’ll listen.”

For those of us that have grown up in church, we have heard this verse all our lives.  I believe in this and pray this all the time.  Why doesn’t that make it easier?  I know that He will take care of us.  I know that he has everything planned out for the bet thing for me!  So why is it that even though we know this and pray this and speak it over our lives, we continue to question it?  The best case scenario is already planned out for us.  We just have to let Him lead us to it.  And it seems that many times, waiting is how we get there.

It doesn’t matter what the situation is.  It could be a job or house or relationship or family member, but ultimately God is in control.  I want to rest in that.  I want to stop trying to do things on my own and give Him control knowing that He already has the best planned for me!

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Letting Go

So, I am continuously amazed by my wife.  She hasn’t had the easiest life for the last year or so, but if you ever read her blog you wouldn’t know that.  She might tell you that some stuff has been rough, but to tell you the truth it has probably been the hardest year or so of her life.  But no matter what is going on she sticks with me through thick and thin.  

Honestly, I don’t really know what that means.  (I mean, I understand what it means but it doesn’t seem to make tons of sense.  I get the thick part.  You could say, “we are right in the thick of it now” and mean that you are right in the middle of all kinds of crap, but what about the thin part?  I have never heard anyone say, “well I guess we can relax now because we are now in the thin of it!”  So where does the thin part come it?)  But that is beside the point (another phrase I don’t get).  She has been through surgery, giving up a job that she LOVED, moving in with a boy, sickness, birth control, and I don’t have to stop there!  But, no matter what, she is always proving to me that she is always there with me through it all, thick or thin, hard or easy, fun or sucky.  I cannot ask for more than that!  I hope that if the situation is ever reversed that I will be able to fight through things as much as she has!  It’s crazy.  

Maybe one day, you will get the whole story, but I’m telling you, if you are going through some rough spots, talk with my wife!  She knows how to deal with them!  She is simply amazing!

I have a lot on my mind as of late and I really covet your prayers.  I am in new and uncharted waters for me and I’m trying to learn how to deal with them.  

Sunday we sang a couple songs that really hit me.  Yes, I picked the songs, but I didn’t realize at the time that it would be exactly what I needed to do.  We sang about surrendering everything to Christ.  Pretty easy to sing and talk about, but not as easy to do.  Maybe that’s just a testament to my faith.  I have had to put a lot of trust and faith in God the past few years through some rough stuff, but He has always come through for me.  You would think that would be example enough for me to keep my mind from being anxious about things, but apparently I’m human.  This morning as I’m trying to lead people in worship through music, I realized that I was not giving everything over to Christ.  I am still trying to do it on my own.  Don’t get me wrong, I still pray about things, but I think I am still not letting go completely.  That’s what I need to do.  Let go.  

This leads me to the other song that really hit me.  The song Everything Glorious.  The whole point of the song is realizing that He is sooooo much bigger than all of this (whatever this may be for you).  When we finally give everything over to Him, He turns it all in to good.  He turns everything into good for the glory of God.  That’s not always an easy subject to grasp considering that we are human and all struggle with some self-centered thoughts now and again (or more often).

I know that He can and will.  I just have to trust Him and give everything over to Him and let Him do it.  I need to hand it off and step out of the way.  Pray for that.

is always the hardest.  That’s what we always here.  Not just my wife and I, but it seems like that’s what the world preaches to us.  Why is that?  Is there a specific reason that the first year is supposed to suck?  It’s because you haven’t lived with each other yet and you don’t REALLY know how they are until then, right?  Well, you don’t really let your true colors shine until you are with each other 24/7, right?