How do you express the way you feel to your wife of 4 years on your first anniversary?  How do you tell her how much you really love her?  How do you let her know how much she means to you?  Is it possible to even explain how much better your life is because she is around?  I’m not sure I have good answers for these questions.

But I do know one thing.  In spite the impossibility of all those questions, my answer is “you try”.  I have done the handmade card.  I have done the letter.  Bought a card well in advance and put thought into it.  Bought the card the day of because I forgot to actually go through with any of my thoughts.  I’ve even done the blog.  But just in an effort to mix it up I thought I would not buy the card I wanted to, come back here and get you some of these instead!

KK, you are the biggest blessing I have ever received.  I say the biggest because if not for you I wouldn’t have my other two biggest blessings!  It’s now been four years (not a normal major milestone, but for a Leap Day marriage it is!) and it seems like it has just flown by!  We have been through some rough stuff together but I wouldn’t go back for the world.  I cannot imagine what my life would be like without you.  I cannot thank you enough for being the amazing wife, the amazing support, the incredible mother and best friend that you are.

Thank you for doing more than just sticking with me through the difficult stuff.  Thank you for holding me up.  Thank you for pushing me forward.  Thank you for catching me when I fall flat on my face.  Thank you for the two beautiful daughters that you have gone through so much to give me.  Thank you for everything that you do to keep our family running and together!  Thank you for the unconditional love that you pour all over our little girls every single day.  Thank you for doing more than just putting up with me.  Thank you for laughing at even a few of my jokes and antics.

Thank you for everything.

(So the littlest one has just decided to start stirring, so if I’m gonna be sneaky about this stuff at all, I am gonna have to wrap it up.)

I love you so much, baby, and I wish I showed you and told you more every single day.  Thank you a zillion times.  Thank you for everything until the day that you turn into this and you finally decide to “death do us part”!  :)

It’s been a few days since the passing of Steve Jobs, former CEO of Apple, and the world is still buzzing about his life and death.  If you knew about him much at all, you knew he had cancer and that his time was short.  Only a few weeks ago, he stepped down from his post as CEO stating that he could no longer fulfill the duties of his job.  That right there was a major key that his battle against cancer had turned south.  42 days later (1 day following the first major keynote presentation without him at the helm) his fight ended.

As everyone that has loved Apple products for the past couple decades is still talking about him, I thought I would join in as well.  He didn’t invent the computer or the phone or the music player but just like the BASF commercials, he made the products that we buy better.  He lead a team that revolutionize these common everyday items and changed our world.  That right there is significant.

I’m not going to sit here and quote Jobs although there are numerous lines I could throw in.  I’m not going to throw a pity party because he is gone although there are many people in real pain because of his passing.  But to me the biggest thing about his life was that he really knew what it meant to change the world.  I don’t know how many times I have heard that phrase “change the world” tossed around (especially in the Christian community).  We want to change our world for Christ.  We put it in our mission statements.  We say it at graduations.  We preach it from our stages.

How many times have you said that?  I know I have.  But I don’t know that I ever really thought about the WORLD when I say it.  We like to throw the phrase around but so often only have a small picture meaning of it.  We aren’t dreaming big or we aren’t really believing that it is possible.  Whether Steve Jobs set out to change the world, I don’t know.  But the fact is that he was definitely not afraid to dream huge and in the process revolutionize the world.

I pray that I will have dreams bigger that what I can accomplish on my own.  I pray that we as Christians will have more than a small picture vision for what God is capable of doing through us and dream big.  Like CEO of Apple big.

Since I have been gone for so long, I thought I might give you a quick update in our lives!

We have now been living in Oklahoma for 8 months.  It has gone by so fast (despite the constant yearning in my soul to go back to Huntington Beach and California) and we have been so busy!  We are back at our church LifeChurch.tv and working rather often on a fill-in basis.  It seems like almost every week and lots of Wednesdays too!  Since moving back we have been blessed to play and visit 7 different campuses and hopefully will add a couple more in the next few months!

Being unemployed was definitely not my plan.  Like…well…everyone I would have dodged that for sure, but the Big Man Upstairs had something else in mind.  It has been restful, playful, and enjoyable!  I have gotten to stay home and take care of my wife who is pregnant with 2.0 and due in just about a month.  I have gotten to roll around on the ground, climb slides, swim for hours and have living room picnics with my amazing little girl.  It has been absolutely wonderful.

There are plenty of reasons I have neglected this site, but none more important that spending tons of time with my family.  It’s not the life I would have picked for us if you had asked me 9 months ago, but it’s definitely been a huge blessing and an absolute blast!  So what’s next?  Beats me!  Vacation to start August, 2.0 arriving in 5 weeks, lots of family, a little more church and then…???  I guess we will see what God has planned for this soon to be family of 4!

Well that’s gonna have to be all for now.  Gotta go change a poopy diaper and keep a toddler from waking up preggo!

…All the moms in my life.  Remember back in the day when Mother’s Days were really easy because you were a little kid, didn’t really care and dad did all the work?  Funny how things change!  Now with a mother, a mother-in-law and a wife that’s a mother the day carries a little more weight.  But how do you celebrate and love on 3 different moms in one day?  Well, hopefully you aren’t just loving on them one day a year, but still.  We have split it up and are spending time with the moms separately.  The zoo with mama, Sunday family lunch with my mom and Monday family dinner with my MIL.

Moms, thank you so much for everything you do for us.  You have been there day in and day out to support, take care of and love us.  We are the people that we are because of you.  We don’t thank you enough.  Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you…

We love you moms!

Sunday night, after the craziness of the Osama bin Laden coverage, my daughter (2.o) was all hyped up…possibly because she will be living in a world without him…but I can’t be certain.  I guess it could have been the after dinner cookies.  She was rolling all over the place and kicking up a storm.  For those of you that don’t know, 2.0 is still 18 weeks from gracing us with her presence and up until now I haven’t been able to feel any of the efforts she has made to try to contact me.

That is until Sunday night!  She is growing and getting stronger and finally made contact!  She still responds to my voice (or so I am told) which is fun, but I still don’t get to really sense it.  But she has now grown enough that I can feel her and even see the direct results of her efforts!  Yeah!

It’s kinda funny how everything is so different with the second kid.  Yes, I am absolutely thrilled we have been blessed with kids.  Yes, it is exciting and awesome, but the truth is it doesn’t have the craziness and newness of the first pregnancy.  We have been here before.  We did already and even though the belly is growing a little bit it still isn’t the same.

But there are a few things that help me break out of that and jump back into the fun, crazy, giddy, excited feelings again.  Of course the first pregnancy test is one, hearing the heartbeat is another.  But the two biggest ones for me are getting to see the baby in the first big ultrasound and then getting to actually feel the baby moving around.

So, yeah.  I’m there.  My baby is coming!  She is kicking!  I just might have 2 future World Cup stars!

So Osama bin Laden was killed May 1st through a US strike.  This is huge victory for the “war on terror” and I’m sure an enormous victory for those across the world that have been hurt or lost loved ones because of his orders and actions.  But the reactions across the United States has stirred up all kinds of feelings and controversy.

As soon as the story broke all over the news channels and Twitter, large groups of people started gathering in several different places in full on celebration.  If you just saw the video without knowing what was going on you would think we had just won the Olympics World Cup (the celebrations weren’t that big).  People chanting U-S-A.  Crowds singing the national anthem, Na-na-na-na hey-hey-hey Goodbye (whatever that one is called) and We Are The Champions.  Obvious job and relief as the FBI’s Most Wanted criminal has come to his end.

But there are also many others who are cringing at the sight of these celebrations.  Frustrated at videos of Americans dancing in the streets at the death of an enemy oddly similar to those we have seen of terrorist groups celebrating after victories.  Christians devastated that there is such celebration of the death of a lost human soul.

My take?  As a Christian we should mourn the loss of any soul that doesn’t accept and receive the salvation through Jesus Christ.  But I also believe that we should be looking to uphold justice.  Would it have been better to capture bin Laden and put him on trial?  Maybe so.  Many would argue yes.  He would get his fair trial and then be sentenced to death.  It would have given him some time to think about his imminent doom.  Would he have changed his mind?  I doubt it.  Could he have changed his mind?  With the power of Christ, yes.

I while I am tempted to say that I am sad that he has no more opportunities to turn to Christ, I am also reminded of all the times throughout the Bible that God had individuals and whole nations wiped off the face of the earth because their hearts were wicked and they wouldn’t turn from their evil ways.  Bin Laden strikes me as one of those.  Doesn’t mean that I’m going to go sing We Are The Champions, but it does give me relief and satisfaction that his evil is stopped, freedom’s fight against the evil of terror took a major step and that there has been justice served for all of the countless families (American and otherwise) that have been devastated and caused such pain because of him

So what say you?

-Interesting Fact-

Bin Laden’s death was announced on May 1st, 2011. Hitler’s death was announced on May 1st, 1945.

-Best Tweets of the Night-

@sugaranddots: Osama Bin Laden, CHECK! Next on the list: 1. Waldo. 2. Carmen Sandiego.

@treykerby: BREAKING — Osama’s mansion was built by the Bluth Company.”

@stoked88: Now I think we all know why there was no season 9 of 24. Well done Jack… well done.

@lizzwinstead: Can we travel with big shampoo again??!

@crownasty: “Sorry it took so long getting a copy of my birth certificate. I was too busy killing Osama Bin Laden.” #ThingsObamaIsThinking

Weird, because normal isn’t working.

Seasons are a crazy thing.  They are never the same.  They don’t always follow the same schedule we pick out for them.  For the past few years my family and I lived in Southern California where there are maybe 2 seasons.  There’s kind of a fall/spring and then there is summer.  That’s it.  Where we were there was no snow.  There was no ice.  No sleet.  Rarely even extreme temperatures above 100.

Now, my family and I are in Oklahoma.  Here there are seasons.  LOTS of seasons.  No, I don’t mean just the normal 4.  There are tons here.  Winter, summer, winter, spring, summer, super summer, fall, summer, fall, winter, frozen tundra, etc.  Rinse and repeat.  The temperature gauge goes anywhere from negatives to well past 100!  Throw in all kinds of rain, sleet, snow, hail, wind, tornadoes, dust and anything else you can think of weather related for a landlocked state and you got yourself some madness.

So why did we move?  Unlike some people we know, we didn’t miss the seasons.  There wasn’t a bone in my body (still isn’t) that is just crying out to get out of the warmth and into the snow.  Just not gonna happen.  I wasn’t bored by the amazingness playfully called weather out there.  God and I are still talking through this one.  But the seasons were changing.  The seasons of our life were changing.  They were changing for growth.  Changing for renewal.  Changing for energizing.  Changing for learning.

At some point in our lives we have to make a decision to follow the leadership of God into different seasons.  We have to be willing to leave the things that we love trusting that He is leading us to something that we need more and will love more.  The move from California to Oklahoma was a tough one for me.  It wasn’t a hard decision to make because I knew it was best for my family, but it was still a tough pill to swallow.  The seasons were changing around me and despite the weatherman inside of me trying to convince me that the Surf City sun was still out, I had to allow God to lead us into a new season.

Think back on the different seasons in your life.  Think about how they have made you and your family who you are.  Some were more fun that others.  Some were much harder than others.  But no matter what kind of weather you find yourself in right now, trust that God is in control of the seasons and He knows what He is doing.

There comes a point in all of our lives when we hit obstacles.  We go through pain or loss.  We lose finances, jobs, people.  The difficulties come and we are faced with the challenge of continuing on vs. giving up or giving in.  It would be so easy to just give in to depression or the woe-is-me’s, but life isn’t always about the easy way out.

I was reminded of this a few days ago as I watched a movie called The Kingdom.   (Disclaimer: The movie has a lot of language and blood, so if those are deterrents for you, don’t watch it.)  The movie follows a group of FBI agents who are investigating a bombing in the Middle East in which there was major loss of life including a friend of theirs.  As they are desperately trying to gain access to the country there is a scene between the Attorney General and the FBI Director.  The AG is dragging his feet and not allowing them to go investigate and the Director is fighting for access and the Director puts it into perspective.

You know, Westmoreland made all of us officers write our own obituaries during Tet, when we thought The Cong were gonna end it all right there. And, once we clued into the fact that life is finite, the thought of losing it didn’t scare us anymore. The end comes no matter what, the only thing that matters is how do you wanna go out, on your feet or on your knees? I bring that lesson to this job. I act, knowing that someday this job will end, no matter what. You should do the same.

FBI Director, The Kingdom

My life has had it’s share of hard times.  I was too small for sports.  I didn’t make the team.  I didn’t pass the test.  I got in trouble at work.  I lost my job.  Our finances aren’t great.  I couldn’t find the home I believed was there for us.  A family member died.  Just to name a few.  Thankfully I have had parents that taught me to fight through these things.  But I wonder how many times in my life I have given up when I came to an obstacle.  How many times have  I gone out on my knees instead of standing up and fighting for something?

Next time I am faced with something major I want to go through it on my feet.  I know that with God I have the strength to do it.  Philippians 4:13 says so.  Or Psalm 91.  Or Psalm 18.  Or Isaiah 40:31.  John 14:27.  And on and on and on…

Well it is finally official!  After our first ultrasound the doctor told us she was 60% sure that 2.0 was a girl.  For those of you that don’t do math, we walked in without having ever seen 2.0 and already had a 50% chance that it was as girl (and an additional 50% that it was a boy).  So again for those of you that don’t like percentages, 60% isn’t much more than 50%.

Well, today we had another ultrasound to check all the vital organs (including the sex).  And now we know that the heart, stomach, kidneys, bladder, etc. are good and that 2.0 is definitely a girl.  Despite her best efforts of keeping her legs crossed (which she did once again…such a stubborn little lady…like her sister) we got a great view and have NO question about it.

So fortunately we don’t have to buy all new clothes!  But we still have to figure out how to have 2 kids.  And we have to pick out another girl name!  So start thinking!  We will revisit the name factory very soon!